CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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