Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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