I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize