so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
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I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
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In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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