Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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