I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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