I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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