Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I just pynch a tree in the face
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
She bit a glass in half.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize