I think I am morally bankrupt
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Randomize