My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize