I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
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She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
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I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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