I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
You can't special order awesome
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize