i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize