if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize