..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize