Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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