Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize