Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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