Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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