It's Friday. Sex?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize