So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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