I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
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We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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