i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize