there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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