I want to have your abortion
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
My dick has a subreddit
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
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