I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize