just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
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Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
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She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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