I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize