Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
we should paint friendship bongs
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