Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Randomize