In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
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