Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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