Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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