1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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