He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize