It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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