This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize