Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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