i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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