we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
We're too hungover to prance.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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