We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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