break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize