so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
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Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
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Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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