I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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