you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize