let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize