im six kinds of drunk right now
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize