she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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