i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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