i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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